This is collection of my poems written in mental hospital. Poems tells about love triangle leading to madness. Other poems tells about travel, fighting with loneliness, addictions and experience of mental hospital patient. I write about struggling with isolation, recall trips (those mental and physical). I write about drugs and alcohol openly as filters of reality, as a way of liberation from society and expansion of perception. Struggling with hangover and side effects, mood disorders and mental illness, sleep deprivation, fasting and meditation to reach altered state of mind. States accessible with chemical keys. Crossing thin line of sanity I enter the world of psychotic correlations with identity, biology of sex and homosexual desire. I look at myself as a mixture of feminine and masculine as gender fluid person. I explore the vision of mind and body itself as a part of the Universe. Microcosmos imprinted mind into whole. I am interested into conversations with God, existence of God inside myself, reincarnation and philosophy of Cosmic Energy. I believe in role of language as a system of communication to represent the creation of my own reality, subjective vision of it. As a carrier of significant meanings correlated with words as separate realities containing whole Universe or simple existence. The edge of sanity is relationship with a woman. Toxic or unhealthy gay relationship, but presence of another being is important. I often sexualise reality to give it a meaning as a human. Meaning of traveling to run away from problems from the woman. Nomad lifestyle being the adventurer and free spirit living outside the society, but still firmly living life of the city. Breathing the city as a creation, living organism, part of the identity. Poet against the world and opposite poet connected with the word.